


Three Words

by ShippenStand



Category: Original Work
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-17
Updated: 2016-06-17
Packaged: 2018-07-15 15:13:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,853
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7227562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShippenStand/pseuds/ShippenStand
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>I ignored the question and threw a dart, missed. "Would you lie to get a blow job?"</i>
</p><p> </p><p>  <i>"Hell, yes."</i></p><p>  <i>"To someone you liked?"</i></p><p>  <i>"Trickier. Depends on the lie."</i></p><p>  <i>"She used the L word." I threw again. Missed again.</i></p><p>  <i>"Cool. Can I watch?"</i></p><p>  <i>"Not lesbian, asshole. The other L word."</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	Three Words

"I love you," she said, her mouth close enough to my dick that I could feel air moving as she spoke, carrying the sound and her excess carbon dioxide. It was the first time she'd said it. It's the kind of thing you expect to hear whispered in your ear, not breathed on your glans.

I knew my lines. I was supposed to say that I loved her, too, and then her mouth would descend, and all the porn words like _hot_ and _wet_ would apply. She was good at it. I knew that already, and did not like to think about what that meant about the number or type of her past relationships, or what it said about me that I wondered.

But if I'd said the words _I love you, too_ all they would have meant was _Please, suck my dick_.

My silence was enough. She moved away and sat back on her heels between my legs. "You weren't ready for that," she said as she pushed her hair back from her face, insightful as usual.

I hated her for a second, but then she reached forward and laid her palm flat, pressing my hard-on into my stomach before wrapping her hand around it and stroking, trailing fingers tipped with painted nails, then rubbing hard and doing nothing predictable and everything that might possibly feel good. I closed my eyes. I could live without a blow job if she gave me this.

Her hand stopped, and I managed not to whine.

"Mmm?" She wanted an answer.

"I wasn't ready for that," I admitted.

"Do you believe me?"

"How can I know how you feel?" I knew I hadn't kept the _that was a stupid question_ tone out of my voice. Her eyes widened, but she didn't seem hurt. Still, I was programmed to apologize, so I did.

"Why are you sorry?" She trailed her fingers down my thigh then sat back on her heels.

"I didn't mean to sound, I don't know..."

"Annoyed?"

"I'm not annoyed. I'm just - " I had no idea how to finish that sentence.

She looked down my body, stopping at where my dick bobbed, frustrated. "I think I know what you are right now." She got off the bed and stepped across the room to where her clothes lay draped on my desk chair.

I sat up and covered myself with the sheet. "It's not just that. Seriously, I mean. I just - "

"Yes, I heard that part." She pulled on her shirt, then combed her hair with her fingers. It fell perfectly back into place. She tilted her head a little, like every stuck-up girl I'd known in high school, like she was too good for my room or for me. I'd never seen the look on her before, though I had expected it in the bar that first time, the night I went to talk to her on a bet. I thought she'd shoot me down, but she had laughed at my joke, and been so easy to talk with. She didn't fit the manicure stereotype.

I stood up and led her back to the bed. She sat down at the edge, and I knelt in front of her, reaching up to touch her face, tracing around her brown eyes. They still looked distant. "You want me to lie to you?" I asked.

"No." She shook her head against my palm.

"If I'd said I loved you, too, what would you think? Would you believe it?" She shrugged my hand away with a toss of her head. I placed it on her thigh, on the outside. "I won't lie to you," I said, trailing my fingers down to her knee. "Sex isn't love."

"I didn't mean it like that."

"I believe you," I said, but I wasn't sure. "Do you want to go, or stay?" I trailed my fingers up her thighs, teasing. It wasn't fair play; I knew what she liked. "Or see what's on TV?"

She reached in for a kiss, then lay back, parting her legs. It was all the answer I needed. I lowered my face and gave her what she wanted, and then some. I didn't get off until after she fell asleep and I jacked myself in the bathroom.

\---=---

"So. Judith?" Dan asked.

"What about her," I said.

"You guys, you know, doing it?"

"Do people still ask that?"

Dan shrugged. "She any good?"

I ignored the question and threw a dart, missed. "Would you lie to get a blow job?"

"Hell, yes."

"To someone you liked?"

"Trickier. Depends on the lie."

"She used the L word." I threw again. Missed again.

"Cool. Can I watch?"

"Not lesbian, asshole. The other L word."

There was a pause as he processed. "Oh."

"Yeah." The last throw went where I wanted, and I walked up to pull the three darts from the cork and write my score.

Dan stepped up. "She yanking your chain or think she means it?"

"I don't know. It's only been a month."

"Six weeks."

"How do you know that?"

"It was the last game of the World Series. That was six weeks ago," Dan said, letting fly with his dart. I was going to lose this one. "You hooked up then."

"Okay, but six weeks? Love?"

"That's not what you said about that chick with the porn star name."

"Jenna? Don't remind me about Jenna."

"Yeah, what is it with you and J names?" Dan threw again, made his target. "You went crazy-go-nuts over her."

"She was intense."

"She was psycho. Is it true the psycho chicks are the best in bed?"

"I don't know." Judith was good, maybe better than Jenna, but she didn't seem psycho.

"So did you lie to her?"

"No."

"Pussy. What self-respecting guy wouldn't lie to get a blow job?"

"You're a pig, Dan, you know that?"

"Yep. You realize this is the first time you've talked about her, right? No raving, no complaining, like with Jenna. You just mention her like she's a fact of life."

"So?"

"You're comfortable with her. She's hot. What's not to like?"

"The problem is love."

"Like, love, whatever. You seem happier. You're easier to be around, that's for sure."

This was getting too personal for me. Plus, Dan being insightful was freaking me out. "Could you please go back to being a pig?"

"Sure." Dan took a long drink of his beer and said, "I'd do her, and I'd lie to her for a blow job."

\---=---

"I’m sorry I said it."

"Don't be. It's okay."

"Well, something's wrong."

All I wanted to do was to stand up and look out the window, gather my thoughts, and then, not talk about it. But we were in a restaurant, a nice one, with apology or anniversary meal prices. There was nowhere to run, and I'd brought her here, so running wouldn't work.

"I never told you about Jenna."

"Who's that?"

"My psycho ex-girlfriend."

"Okay." She waited with her eyebrows raised. That was one thing I liked about her, that she could wait for me to answer.

I looked around the restaurant, anywhere but at her face. "I don't want to talk about her because, blah, blah, damaged by a past relationship, yadda, yadda."

"Okay."

When I looked at her she looked like she was expecting bad news, but still she waited. I kept looking at her, and in this light she was more than just pretty, she was beautiful. That was the scary part. Jenna had been pretty like a model, and every other guy saw it, too. "Trust issues," was all I said.

"She fucked around on you."

I sat back, as if the crude word had hit me in the chest. I'd never heard her even say _damn_. "Yeah."

"You don't think I have issues of my own?"

I closed my eyes for a moment, then reached for my wine. At the moment, it didn't taste very good. "Why do you think you love me? You're damn near perfect, and I'm... I'm just me."

"I like you," she said, "and I'm not perfect. I just try to pretend I am."

"Huh?" This was not going anywhere I expected.

"All this?" she said, holding up her hands with the polished nails, then running her fingers through her hair, "this is armor." Her hair swung back into place, and even I knew it was a good haircut, an expensive haircut.

"Armor? Protecting yourself from what?"

"Everyone."

I had a flash of inspiration. "So you told me you loved me to push me away?"

"Maybe. It usually works that way."

"And you can't be straightforward and just break it off because...?" She didn't fill in the blank. I wasn't sure if this was girl logic or something else. "Help me out here."

"Blah, blah, damaged goods, yadda, yadda," she quoted back at em. "Beloved uncle wanted to be more than beloved." Her tone was matter of fact, and I couldn't tell if she was mocking me for what I'd said about Jenna, or what. She reached for her purse. "Thanks for dinner. Thanks for everything. I'll get a cab."

"Wait. You keep trying to leave, and I won't stop you, I won't call you, it can be over. Just tell me one thing. Truth or dare. Give me a straight answer or you buy dinner."

She looked suspicious. "What?"

"Why the armor, why the crack about being damaged goods?"

She shook her head. "Bzzt. That's two questions."

"Let me rephrase. What's the damage you think you have to cover up with armor?" Then the uncle comment hit me. I must have said some lame version of I'm sorry, but her lips just quirked once.

She looked at a dish on the table, part of the whole frou-frou restaurant thing, with three colored salts in it. She pressed her finger into the black crystals and tasted it. "Call it attachment issues. I like sex. Sex with you is fun, but this is about the time when a guy expects a girl to get attached, so I push those buttons until they push me away. It's easier." Then, " Jenna?"

I spoke without thinking. "I wanted to marry her. We lived together. She came home with penis breath." It did not come out like I intended, not like I would want to say it to my girlfriend, if she was still my girlfriend, but instead of looking offended, Judith laughed.

"I'm sorry. I'm not laughing about what she did. I'm laughing because only you would put it that way."

"I make you laugh and the sex is good. Why leave?"

"It's what I do."

"Maybe we don't play stupid relationship games and just, you know, hang out?"

She rolled her eyes, but it seemed not to be directed at me. "Lick our wounds together?"

"And other things, I hope." What the hell. I grinned. Best to punch the button now and see how it went.

She kicked me under the table, but she stayed.

\---=---

Six months later I slid a ring on her finger. Her nail was short, plain, and beautiful.


End file.
